On your last bit, I definitely agree... personally I've leaned more and more into KISS above all else... simple things that are easy to replace are easily replaced only when you need to. Similarly, I also tend to push for initial implementations of many/most things in a scripted language first, mostly for flexibility/simplicity to get a process "right" before worrying about a lot of other things.
One thing that came out of the no-sql/new-sql trends in the past decade and a half is that joins are the enemy of performance at scale. It really helps to know and compromise on db normalization in ways such as leaning on JSON/XML for non-critical column data as opposed to 1:1/children/joins a lot of the time. For that matter, pure performance and vertical scale have shifted a lot of options back from the brink of micro service death by a million paper cuts processes.
One thing that came out of the no-sql/new-sql trends in the past decade and a half is that joins are the enemy of performance at scale. It really helps to know and compromise on db normalization in ways such as leaning on JSON/XML for non-critical column data as opposed to 1:1/children/joins a lot of the time. For that matter, pure performance and vertical scale have shifted a lot of options back from the brink of micro service death by a million paper cuts processes.